Only the Devil can make this stuff up

This has been a banner week for You-Can’t-Make-This-Stuff-Up news.

Last Thursday, Francis appointed Cardinal Kevin Farrell as Camerlengo of Holy Roman Church. This means that when Jorge mercifully (for us) takes his leave of this world, it will be Farrell, who, during the interregnum, will exercise specific duties leading up to the next conclave. For instance:

[He] must officially ascertain the Pope’s death … [and] must also place seals on the Pope’s study and bedroom … take possession of the Apostolic Palace in the Vatican … the Palaces of the Lateran and of Castel Gandolfo … [and] has the duty of safeguarding and administering the goods and temporal rights of the Holy See. (cf Universi Dominici Gregis)

The appointment, which demonstrates Farrell’s high standing in the Bergoglian regime, came just days before the laicization of Farrell’s old roomy, Uncle Ted McCarrick, whom the former claims never showed signs of a perverted predilection for pederasty. Right!

Furthermore, according to Universi Dominici Gregis:

The Cardinal Camerlengo and the three Cardinal Assistants pro tempore are obliged to be especially vigilant in ensuring that there is absolutely no violation of secrecy with regard to the events occurring in the Sistine Chapel, where the voting takes place, and in the adjacent areas, before, as well as during and after the voting. (ibid.)

Perhaps this is why Farrell was chosen; I mean, he’s more than proven that he’s adept at keeping secrets, has he not?

Then there was news that among the speakers featured at the Vatican’s upcoming Dog-n-Pony show summit on clerical sex abuse will be such steadfast pro-homo clerics as Cardinals Blase Cupich of Chicago and Reinhard Marx of Germany. That’s like appointing Michael Milkin and Bernard Madoff to a task force charged with combatting the problem of financial scams and securities violations.

The meeting is being convened under the title, “The Protection of Minors in the Church;” causing many to wonder why abuse involving “vulnerable adults” (like Uncle Ted’s seminarians) is apparently being ignored.

The reason is obvious enough; the topic is off limits because buggery between adults is the present-day Vatican’s National Pastime.

As surreally absurd as these stories are, the most laughable You-Can’t-Make-This-Stuff-Up news item of the week concerns an Open Letter sent to participants of the aforementioned summit by the two remaining Dubia Brothers – Cardinals Walter Brandmüller and Raymond Burke.

As one might well have expected, the letter starts off with a magnificently impotent whimper: “We turn to you with deep distress!”

Isn’t it inspiring when senior churchmen – father figures in positions of authority – rather than rising to the occasion when those in their charge are facing a clear and present danger, whine about their own distress to other, equally as pathetic, prelates?

After securing a few headlines by rightly pointing to “the plague of the homosexual agenda within the Church” emboldened by the “even public denial, by words and by acts, of the divine and natural law … that corrupts certain circles in the Church,” Burke and Brandmüller had the unadulterated audacity to write:

In the face of this situation, Cardinals and Bishops are silent. Will you also be silent on the occasion of the meeting called in the Vatican for this coming February 21st?

The sheer hypocrisy on display here is beyond belief!

Burke has been mute for more than two years now after initially promising to issue a “formal act of correction” in light of Bergoglio’s pertinacious denials of the Divine and Natural Laws in Amoris Laetitia. And somehow he imagines that he has the moral authority to urge others not to remain silent?

He writes:

Sexual abuse is blamed on clericalism.But the first and primary fault of the clergy does not rest in the abuse of power but in having gone away from the truth of the Gospel.

Even in the context of a co-authored Open Letter, Leo the Cowardly Lion cannot summon the cc-c-c-courage to state the simple fact that it is Bergoglio himself who invented the clericalism excuse.

Rather than being ashamed of the spinelessness they displayed by tucking their tails between their legs and running away when Jorge made it plain that he has no intention of responding to the Dubia, Burke & Brandmüller actually brag about these events as if they are a badge of honor:

We are among those who in 2016 presented to the Holy Father certain questions, “dubia,” which were dividing the Church in the wake of the conclusions of the Synod on the Family. Today, those “dubia” have not only not had any response but are part of a more general crisis of the Faith. Therefore, we encourage you to raise your voice to safeguard and proclaim the integrity of the doctrine of the Church … A decisive act now is urgent and necessary.

A decisive act to safeguard the doctrine of the Church; like the “formal act of correction,” perhaps?

Let’s face it, folks, there is not even one member of the episcopate – including those validly consecrated but lacking formal jurisdiction – with the mustard seed’s worth of faith to carry out the one decisive act that is most urgently needed to protect the doctrine of the faith today.

Kevin Farrell, Blase Cupich, Reinhard Marx, Walter Brandmüller, Raymond Burke…

These are the kinds of men that some tradition-minded Catholics are waiting on to tell them what their eyes can already plainly see: Jorge Mario Bergoglio is a formal heretic and apostate who has, of his own volition, severed himself from the Body of Christ – the Holy Catholic Church of which he is no longer a member; much less its head on earth.

This is rather like a grown man who is caught in the midst of a thunderstorm but cannot bring himself to acknowledge the precipitation, much less warn his loved ones of the situation, until the weatherman declares that it’s raining; in spite of the fact that he’s soaking, ringing, wet.

And this is perhaps the greatest You-Can’t-Make-This-Stuff-Up story of our lifetime.

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